It is undeniable, this time of year is on my mind.
I have come a very long way from last year. I have learned some things. I have packed memories away. Losing Rachael is something I will never completely recover from. Losing her, and not knowing why, is even more difficult.
I loved her as much as I have ever really loved anyone.
She taught me some things, and maybe not lovely things, but important none-the-less. Of course they go against all my tendencies of fostering relationships that are real, but it is realistic to at least consider:
- There is no one who you can put all your self in without risking losing too much if they ever decide to leave.
- Anyone can leave/be taken at any time.
- Can you still be whole after they do?
I am not ever going to write about this again.
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